Am I in the wrong here?

Your Cliffs give no indication as to what you'd be in the wrong about.

But yeah, probably.
 
Between the weird virgin friend and this violent, selfish prick, you gotta get some new friends.
 
Dont hang out with stupid people who get into fights, and if you do, then understand its your own decision so dont complain for being involved in stupid things when it was you in the first place who decided to put yourself into stupidity zone

I dont get in those kind of problems....guess why? well I dont hang out with stupid people

If you dont see that, well then you are stupid as well

and thats just that
 
Pugilistic said:
Last year I was involved in an incident that resulted in one friend getting arrested and me being extremely disappointed in another friend who started it all. It's a story of drunk douchebags, racism, and just all around stupidity. Below is a really long post which I should really make shorter but don't know how.
At the time I had a friend (whom I will call Bill and have mentioned before) who is a Korean American I have known for years. It was sort of an awkward relationship because the guy was extremely negative, socially awkward, and seemed to lack absolutely any self-awareness. It was a process of finding out more and more things I didn't respect about him. But, I've known him for years and we had a lot of mutual friends. I also felt sorry for him. Despite his negativity, I also didn't think he was a bad person deep inside.

Then last year, Bill, two other friends (white guys), and myself went out to a really crowded lounge bar on a Saturday night. I remember at one point we were working our way through the crowd, with Bill at the lead. I got left behind because I ran into a girl I know. As I was talking to her, I hear this commotion in front of me and see a guy fly back on the table in front of me, spilling drinks everywhere. I go forward a bit to see what's happening and I see that it's Bill. Then I see him hit another guy in the face. It seems he's pushed a guy (a local Korean) really hard then hit the guy's buddy in the face. Then I see the security guards shove through and grab Bill and take him outside. The white dudes follow, and I follow them.

There's a lot of fucking people and I'm pretty wasted so it takes me some time to finally make it outside and when I do, I see that Bill is gone, and the Korean guys and white guys are in an arguing match. Actually I get closer and see that one white guy (Paul) is apologizing in English and trying to shake the guys' hand but the Korean guys (one douche in particular) are really angry and yelling profanities at them in Korean. There was one guy from the group who was relaxed and he was trying to mediate. He was actually very friendly and he talked to me and asked about Bill. In my drunk stupor I told him that I've been friends with this dude for years and that this kind of shit never happened. I was trying to talk to this group to smooth things over. This was a mistake. The guys who were hit were too angry to do anything else other than glare and scream profanities. Dumb mistake on Bill's part, but fuck those guys.

I'm trying to text or call Bill multiple times to know what's happening but he doesn't respond. I want to him to at least own up to his mistake so the guys who are innocent don't get in trouble. Or just tell us what happened.

I tell the white guys that they need to get out of here because they might call the police, because that's what usually Koreans do when they get involved in fights. And because they are white, the police are going to automatically side with the locals. But these guys are new to the country and think it's just like where they're from so they don't believe me.

Sure enough, the police come and they hear what the angry Koreans have to say, and promptly put cuffs on Paul. They claim Paul hit them too. I don't know why they singled out Paul and not me or the other guy. Paul isn't the type to get violent so I'm convinced it's bullshit, not to mention even if he did, they didn't have any proof. It seemed that the Korean guys were pissed off and they just wanted to point the finger to somebody since they didn't have the actual culprit.

I ask the cops if this is allowed; to arrest somebody purely on hearsay. I ask them if they don't need evidence, because Paul didn't do anything except try to mediate. They just say something, "Oh we'll figure out if he's guilty or not." and take him away. The "friendly" guy I talked to earlier points me out to a cop and the cop approaches me with, "So you're friends with that guy who punched the other guy?"

This is where I should've not gotten involved at all and claimed that I don't know Bill, but in a mix of being drunk, desperately wanting to help Paul, and being pissed at Bill, I say yes. They ask me for his address but I say I don't remember. They ask me if I have his number and I have a hard time lying when I just told them I'm his friend.

The cops take Paul away and me and my other friend follow him to the station. They don't allow us in, but the Korean guys who framed Paul are in there giving them their testimony. We can see through the glass door that Paul is visibly frustrated to say the least. The thing is, he had a flight out of Korea that following morning at like 11am.

Since Paul can't speak Korean and the cops can't speak English, they let me in to interpret. I'm frustrated so I grill the detective (a guy who wasn't even on the scene) about how this is can be justified. In my frustration I told him that it was Bill who's guilty, not Paul. He just keeps repeating that they will get video evidence and find out for sure. To me it seemed he already made up his mind that Paul is guilty. They said the owner of the bar will provide them with the security cam footage. So we wait there for hours and in the end they let Paul go at around 8am. I don't know if they even got the footage in the end but they took my info down just in case new evidence showed up proving Paul's guilt. They said if he was found guilty, I would be partially responsible for bringing him back to Korea so he would be charged. Fucking bullshit. Since I didn't hear back from them in more than a year, it's obvious they had nothing.

Luckily Paul made it back his home country in time, and the other guy and I had a bonding memory of waiting at the police station together. But fuck Bill, I thought. I'm in my thirties and don't want to get involved in that kind of stupidity so I didn't want to waste my time hanging out with people who would start shit. I don't want to spend another night trying to get a friend out of jail because another friend was being stupid. I met up with Bill to hear his side of the story a few days later, and he disappointed me even more. He said one of the guys elbowed him while he was walking past so he pushed him onto the table and the other stepped up to him so he "lightly" popped him. I tell him that what he committed was still assault in the eyes of the law, and his response was that it wasn't a fight because if it was a fight, he would have hurt them more. His attitude was that they were lucky he didn't fuck them up more. I almost facepalmed. He didn't get the point. If it was self-defense I would get it but he pretty much admitted that they didn't try to fight him but he attacked them because he was pissed off.

I was already questioning my friendship with this dude but this broke the camel's back. As weird and negative as he is, Bill never caused any sort of real trouble, but now he did. And this attitude of his made me think he would do it again. I couldn't believe the immaturity he was exhibiting, especially considering he was older than me. I didn't want to hang out with him again, but we had a lot of mutual friends so we kind of had to and when I did, I was wary of his potential outbursts. The cops eventually got a hold of him and the guy he hit pressed charges on him. It cost him lots of money in legal fees and he almost got deported (since he's not a Korean citizen). At one point he cut me and a lot our mutual friends off. He basically disappeared, which was fine by me. But recently I've ran into him here and there since we live in the area. He's gotten himself a new crew of friends (whom I know as well) and he's cordial with me but apparently he's been talking shit about me. Saying I'm a snitch and it's because of me that he got caught and almost deported.

I do wish I didn't get involved at all but in the moment I didn't know what else to do because my first priority was getting my innocent friend out. Fuck the guy who starts shit and leaves his friends behind. I don't know. What would you guys do? Am I snitch?

Cliffs:
1. Friend punches a guy at a bar and leaves the scene
2. Another friend gets arrested because of racist cops
3. I spend the entire night trying to get the innocent friend out
4. Guilty friend acts hard instead of being sorry for ditching us after starting shit
5. Same guy blames me for the legal troubles he's had
Click to expand...

That story was an absolute cluster fuck.

It sounds to me like deep down you knew Bill was no good and you hung around anyway until something finally came to a head. If you can't persuade people who are clearly a beacon of negative energy to grow up and change for the better, you need to distance yourself from them as much as possible or they will bring you down sooner or later. It sounds like that was the case here.
 
Apparently all us white people are named Bill and Paul.

Fuck ah you Pug!
 
Ah, so your friends see how it feels to be minorities in a country where the majority run law enforcement.

But I digress...

The white guys' problem is that they never had to think like minorities. After the altercation, they should've just gotten tf out before the cops came.

That Bill character is a hot head. You tried to mediate (you actually went above and beyond), he started some mess and left the rest of y'all to deal with it.

I see nothing wrong with not wanting to hang out with him. It is always a good idea to avoid people who are a magnet for drama.
 
Last edited:
Sounds like you were stuck between your boys.

From the sounds of it, you didnt instigate anything. One friend filled the room with uppercuts, then fled, and the cops arrested your other friend for no reason. Then you defend your friend who didnt do anything. Did I get that right?

So why is the other friend mad at you, did you rat on him? I only read the cliffs.

Doesnt seem like you did anything wrong.
 
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