ALIEN: COVENANT Thread v.2 (Dragonlord's Review, post #1)

If you have seen ALIEN: COVENANT, how would you rate it?


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Any explanation for why the lead chick has such a hideous haircut?
 
The internet is a scary place. I read @Dragonlordxxxxx 's review thinking "who the hell were Fifeld and Milburn again?" so I googled them and one of the hits was this:

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And another:

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Wtf?

See Internet rules 34 and 41.

Any explanation for why the lead chick has such a hideous haircut?

Obvious pandering to Ripley lovers. Short curly hair, tank top, sweaty skin. Sorry guys, there is only one Queen in THIS house.

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So they took out the most interesting part of Prometheus - Engineers and their origins, and just made another Alien movie? Plus the characters are idiots? Riddles must be trolling us.


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Shit, now I don't want to pay money for this. My buddy is probably going to drag me to see it regardless, but fuck man, can Hollywood stop with these botches of classic films/prequels?
 
Update: May 10, 2017

Dragonlord's Review of ALIEN: COVENANT
(No Spoilers)

Bottom Line: Incredibly making Prometheus seemed decent in comparison, Alien: Covenant is a glorified monotonous pit stop to whatever convoluted 4-movie prequels Ridley Scott has planned.

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Set 10 years after the events of Prometheus, the story begins with the crew of the colony ship Covenant receiving a possible distress call coming from an uncharted planet that seemed to be paradise for humans to live on. Once there, the crew discover the world is much dangerous than it seems but none more dangerous than encountering David, the android from the doomed Prometheus expedition.

From the get go, none of the human characters in Covenant are interesting or memorable enough and except for a few, most of them are just faceless red shirts. Some of them act annoyingly hysterical which results in some facepalming reactions and some act like they're in a B-movie slasher flick, but worst of all, a few do something so incredibly stupid that you end up wondering if Weyland-Yutani intentionally hires morons to be part of their billion dollar expeditions.

Katherine Waterston plays Daniels and although she is probably the "best" character among these losers, she's not written very well nor does she have any notable moments. Michael Fassbender did a superb job with his dual role of David and Walter. Most were expecting Danny McBride to stink up the place but he turned out to be one of the very few reasonably decent characters. Billy Crudup's Oram joins the ranks of Fifeld and Millburn as the dumbest people in the Alien series.

Despite the many flaws of Prometheus and the numerous dumb human actions, the characters there were at least not boring and Elizabeth Shaw (Noomi Rapace) was a good leading character that had many memorable exciting scenes. Prometheus even had some thrilling action spectacle that wowed audience and expanded the Alien mythology.

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Those that are expecting to learn more about the Engineers will be sorely disappointed as they are just briefly touched upon. The whole movie just feels like one big glorified set-up to show the transition from black goo to neomorph to finally xenomorph. Ridley Scott stated he plans to make three more Alien prequels after Covenant. The problem now is we will get three more movies in the future to convolutedly and exhaustingly tie everything up leading up to the first Alien movie where the Engineer spacecraft somehow lands at the LV-426 moon.

The horror element in Covenant is quite satisfactory, showcasing some spine-chilling terror and graphic kills. The action though is hugely disappointing with the last two big action sequences being uninspiring and unexceptional. The pacing during the last few minutes after the fake-out ending seemed rushed and dissonant.

The xenomorph felt shoehorned. The pink-skinned neomorph was a worthy adversarial monster on its own and much creepier than the xenomorph.

If this is what Ridley Scott has in store for future Alien prequels, he should just stop and do something else. Or better yet, allow Neill Blomkamp to proceed with his planned Alien do-over sequel where Hicks and Newt are still alive. Interest for the Alien franchise will probably die down steadily with each prequel Ridley releases. This is starting to feel more and more like when George Lucas' botched up the Star Wars prequels.

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They killed off James Franco's character right from the start due to a fire in his hypersleep capsule. That's too bad since he would have liven things up and it would have been fun to see him and Danny McBride in a serious sci-fi movie.

Even if the computer readings says it's okay, it should have been standard protocol to wear a space suit when landing on a new planet.

When David takes the Covenant crew back to his base, why did everyone feel safe from the neomorph when the entrance had many openings?

Facepalm moment when one of the female crew decide to wander off alone in David's lair.

The neomorph responding calmly in the presence of David and the xenomorph mimicking David seemed to go against what we know of the species and what David himself also stated, that they are extremely hostile and aggressive.

The award for the dumbest character action goes to Billy Crudup's Oram. Even though he already discovered that David probably killed Shaw and David confessing to his sinister incubating schemes, Oram still stuck his head in an ovomorph (Alien egg).

Killing off Elizabeth Shaw, offscreen no less, was a huge mistake. She was one of the few bright spots in Prometheus and fans liked her. They could have built the franchise around her.

David kissing Walter and David forcing a kiss on Daniels were WTF moments.

The David and Walter fight was good.

The big extraction action scene and the ending action scene were meh.

The pacing at the end felt rushed. The survivors get on board the mothership and rest, then the alarm goes off with the computer saying another life form is detected on board. There was no suspense or build-up to the xenomorph getting on board.

In space, no one can hear you scream. With each passing Alien prequels, no one cares anymore.

Rating: 5.5/10 or 6/10



Link to previous thread: http://forums.sherdog.com/posts/129824229/


fabulous
 
agree with everything

huge wasted opportunity. Prometheus may have been a bit stupid and shit, but it could have laid a strong foundation for a good movie this go around. If they focused more on the engineers and what happened to them, there was still a lot of chances to set up the existing Alien canon in a way that made sense. Instead they did the opposite. "Hey you know the bits people actually found interesting about Prometheus? yeah fuck those bits. ALIEN! Blood! Explosion!"

This prequel series is going to keep fucking things up, then someone is going to have to take it away from Ridley and reboot the shit to make it right. We live in a day and age where movie makers should know better than to go the full George Lucas. Never go full George Lucas.
 
I was looking for this thread @Dragonlordxxxxx to post my review in. I gave it a 7 because I thought it was entertaining at least. Maybe I'm more lenient because I freaking love the alien franchise. I won't give up on it yet...
 
Did this movie intentionally piss people off? Is that the point?
 
agree with everything

huge wasted opportunity. Prometheus may have been a bit stupid and shit, but it could have laid a strong foundation for a good movie this go around. If they focused more on the engineers and what happened to them, there was still a lot of chances to set up the existing Alien canon in a way that made sense. Instead they did the opposite. "Hey you know the bits people actually found interesting about Prometheus? yeah fuck those bits. ALIEN! Blood! Explosion!"

This prequel series is going to keep fucking things up, then someone is going to have to take it away from Ridley and reboot the shit to make it right. We live in a day and age where movie makers should know better than to go the full George Lucas. Never go full George Lucas.
Prometheus wasn't stupid.. It was smart. Stupid people ruined Prometheus.
 
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fuck. I gotta admit I wasn't that interested in this movie for the longest time but the most recent tv spot grabbed me and I started to get hyped ....oh well
 
So they took out the most interesting part of Prometheus - Engineers and their origins, and just made another Alien movie? Plus the characters are idiots? Riddles must be trolling us.


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Haven't seen it yet but reading your comment, I am now let-down. I was looking forward to more Engineers and Origin history, not a regurgitation of all the past Alien movies (just action with the Zenos killing everyone).

I don't get the people who demand more action ; you already have it in the previous Alien moves ; so wouldn't you want a script that delves into the origins ?
 
Prometheus wasn't stupid.. It was smart. Stupid people ruimed Prometheus.
It was a decent flick but there was lots of stupid in it ; the script writers made the scientists out to be a bunch of dumbass amateurs.
 
The reviews I'm reading seem very divided and all over the place. Some people loved it and some people hated it.
 
@Dragonlordxxxxx I don't really have any hope Blommkamp is going to get his kick at the can, but is this by any chance bad enough to bomb and thus possibly spare us 2 more dire cash-ins trying to lead us back to Alien?

I know I'm coming off as a hater but fuck it.
If Covenant really bombs at the box office, I think there's a strong chance they'll halt the brakes on Ridley's planned prequels.
 
Rating: 5.5/10 or 6/10

Good lord, that's the lowest I've seen you rate a film. I have had high expectation of this film and avoided all trailers and threads regarding it to prevent any spoilers.

But I'm still watching it, likely this weekend.
 
@Dragonlordxxxxx , I read somewhere that FOX masterminded a surprise Alien 5 by Blomkamp as a way to light a fire under Ridley Scott's ass to finish the Prometheus sequel they wanted....

If Scott was rushed into making this, it's no surprise its so poorly written/put together
Interesting theory which is entirely plausible. But I just think Fox was hedging their bets by approving of Blomkamp's Alien 5. If Ridley takes too long to make Prometheus 2 or doesn't make it at all, they have Blomkamp's Alien 5 to fall back on. I think Fox liked Blomkamp's Alien 5 as well since Sigourney Weaver was attached to it.
 
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