Best description of a fight ever?

Stompatron

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What do you consider the best description of a fight? I like reading write ups about well known fights. I recently read this cracked article and it had me in tears. Here's a sample:

UFC 100 - The Ragdoll Landing Zone

Going into UFC 100, Michael "The Count" Bisbing had managed to build up a full steam of douchebaggery with his pre-fight comments and dick behavior on The Ultimate Fighter reality show. The crowd was definitely not on his side.

Luckily, if this hurt Bisbing's feelings, Henderson hit him hard enough in the second round that he got to walk through a tunnel and talk to Jesus personally about it. Dan's right hand dropped him like a cartoon. He hit him so hard that even gravity got scared. Bisbing hung in mid-air for a moment while gravity screamed at inertia, "Did you see that shit!?" Then, after a high five, the two universal forces quit screwing around and yanked Bisbing's limp body into the floor.

Henderson wasn't done dominating Bisbing and gravity, though. After the man-shaped sack of bangers and mash landed, Dan flew into the air and came down on Bisbing's head with Fistos, the forbidden punch of legend. Henderson went fully horizontal with both feet in the air like some kind of maniac skydiver. If you were the greatest warrior that ever lived, came across a sleeping enemy and had six hours to plan one ultimate punch, this is the punch you would throw.

Link to the cracked article if interested
 
I miss SeanBaby's mma articles

check them all out, if you haven't read em
 
"Bloodbath"


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I miss SeanBaby's mma articles

check them all out, if you haven't read em
Came here to say this. His cracked articles are amazing

http://www.cracked.com/blog/worst-life-ever-the-story-of-kazuyuki-fujitas-skull/

And his description of a Gary Goodridge fight. Always makes me laugh

Gary Goodridge wasn't letting out little "WOO"s like Ric Flair; he was belting them out. When you hit a man as hard as you can ten times and it only makes him sing like Little Richard, there aren't a whole lot of Plan B's. At that point, all you can do is hope that your mortuary makeup artist has a good Before picture and a lot of spackle in your color.
After giving something for Amir to see every time he closed his eyes ever again, Gary Goodridge grabbed his left arm, pulled it behind his back, and dropped the kind of punch that stimulates neurological job growth. His unfrozen Trinidadian caveman fist bounced Amir's head off the canvas and one of the impacts knocked him out cold with his eyes open. The next three punches didn't do anything to help him wake up, but they confused the shit out of Tokyo seismologists.
 
UFC 181 - Lawler vs. Hendricks 2 - Deez Nuts

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